austin craigslist > missed connections

Amanda - We took a cab to your place but never made it - m4w - 26 (Continental club)

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Date: 2009-06-22, 10:07PM CDT

Sorry for the dramatic title that sounds like we had a tragic accident. It's actually a funny story, when it does not happen to you. I really hesitated to post this one in missed connection, rants, misc romance or strictly platonic, it could fit in all, kind of.

If your name is Amanda and you woke up at the hospital on sunday morning wondering what the fuck happened the night before, I can tell you. Or if you know a person named amanda who tells you to fuck off when you ask how her week end was, you might want to read too.

We met saturday night at the Continental club around 11:30, you asked me how was the first band, if I knew the one coming after and things like that, you know, bar talk. Your friends had left but you wanted to stay out a bit longer, same with me. So we started chating, I told you I was from france (true, no bs, been living in the US for 3 years, so that's why there might be typos and weird phrases) and you said you visited and loved the city I'm from. So far so good. And you were hot btw. And cute, not the hoe type. Anyway, for the next couple of hours we had a few drink, we talked, we danced, and before I could realize, we were making out. And let me get this straight, while I don't look too bad, I'm no brad pit either, so I'm not really used to random cute chicks coming at me and wanting to stick their tongue in my mouth only a couple of hours after I met them. I haven't had a girlfriend for a while, so hell yeah that was awesome. Of course we were both a little drunk, but the thing is, while I stuck to beer all night, you were chugging down vodka-tonics and I should have paid more attention to that. Oh, funny detail, I forgot my phone at home that night, so I did not ask for your number when I could have, but whatever, we were already past first base and ready to move to second or third one, whatever they stand for.
We decided to leave and I offered you a ride home. We both knew what it meant, one night stand and we were ok with it. I didn't have my car and I was a drunk anyway, so we went for a cab.
That's where things started getting sketchy. When the driver asked for an address, you could not give an accurate one, and he started driving. You passed out while we were cuddling in the back. But hey, it was past 2am and we had a few drink, nothing wrong there, I was tired too. But then when we got closer to where you supposedly lived, I woke you up, and, OMG!!!! you barfed all over yourself and the back seat. Miraculously, I was not hit, I just had time to dodge. So, first of all, believe it or not, that turned me off a bit, you were a lot less attractive with puke on your face, hands and dress. It's not personal, I think it is human nature, no matter how hot you are, you don't look good when drowning in vomit.
The cab driver was pissed off (no shit) but stayed cool and said I'll have to pay a $100, not only for cleaning but also because his night was pretty much over. I could have been a douche, pay the guy, dump you there and grab another cab home. But I felt a little responsible. I paid for those drinks after all. So we decided to try to take you home ("we" is now the driver and I, because you're pretty much gone). Of course, any erotic thoughts were long but I did not want to be a total dick. So I took the front seat and we started searching for your place. Not that I didn't want to seat next to you, I did not want to seat in your vomit. The smell was pretty bad too. Problem is we didn't really know where you lived, and now the only thing coming out of your mouth was just drunk non-sense. We tried to decode that shit and really searched for an entire hour, no kidding, with the counter still running. We were just clueless, we could not get your attention for more than 2 seconds and you had to puke again a couple more times. I tried to dig in your puke covered purse to see your ID. Sorry, I know you are not supposed look inside ladies purse, especially on first night, but believe me, if I did not have to, I wouldn't have, I almost puked too. Unfortunately the address on your card was not even in austin. We asked if you could call a friend. Unfortunately, dialling was out of your capability. I could have looked in your contacts, but no way, I was not gonna use a phone frosted with vomit, I was not that drunk.
So after an hour driving, windows down, we just gave up. The procedure in that case is to find a cop. I'm really sorry it had to end like that, but you did not give us a choice. Believe me, I really wish we could have found your place and drop you off, but we were really running out of option and I already owed the guy over $150. So we found a cop. He was nice, I explained him the situation and surprisingly he did not ask too many questions. He called an ambulance, they showed up and they loaded you in. They could not get your address either, they could not even get your name, I had to tell them. They said they'd take you to south austin hospital while you were throwing up more.
From there the cab gave me a ride home, and I ended paying him $200. What a night. I don't even have your phone number, but might be better this way.

What I really don't get is how you changed so suddenly. When we get in the cab, sure we were both drunk, but you could walk, you were still making sense, laughing and all. You know, the funny drunk. And less than 10 minutes later, you were a zombie, blacked out.
Of course I felt like a dick when I just passed you over to the cops and left, but what was I supposed to do? Follow you to the hospital? Well it was almost 4am, I was drunk and that did not come to my mind. And the cops asked me to leave.

Anyway, that was my saturday night, pretty exciting hu! Lesson learnt, next time a pretty stranger decides to spend the night with me, I'll make sure she does not get hammered. Or I ask where she lives first.
So if you happen to know that girl, Amanda, hospital on Saturday night, tell her what happened, she probably forgot most of it. I'm not going to be a prick and say she also owes me $200, but when she gets better, maybe I can buy her another drink. Just one, this time.

  • Location: Continental club
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